Haiku Contest: Mark II

June 6, 2007

 

There was a time, in the primordial days of Beats Entropy…that I called upon the readership to battle us. In Haiku. Many live were lost, yet I call upon you again join the fray.  The winner (as judged by the Arbitron 6500) will receive a fabulous mystery prize.

Rules of engagement: like so (points downwards)

Traditional (5-7-5)

Write a Haiku jerk
Would you have me look a fool
I will destroy you

Alternately you can write a Beats Entropy-style Haiku:

Three verses of 7-5-7 that tell a loose story. Punctuation optional.

Who has stolen my old life?
I commend you sir.
Were you not my dead brother!

—————

Let us ride this giant bee.
She thinks us her queen.
Tomorrow there shall be war.

——————————-

The worker grows suspicious.
Stings us twenty times!
The war is surely lost now.

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35 Responses to “Haiku Contest: Mark II”


  1. Don’t hire lazy unicorns!
    They are not like us.
    Unfit for the mundane world.
    ——————————————-

    Magic horse can’t get no job.
    who gonna feed his foal?
    Majesty don’t pay the rent.
    —————————————-
    Filly sees it on the news.
    Liquor store held up!
    Ain’t but one Unicorn left.

  2. Sarah Allura Says:

    Suckling the sky cow
    thousand year dance without pause
    my blood is butter

  3. David Kehoe Says:

    Your dry tears unwept
    Heart bursting by reasons decree
    Solipsistic end

  4. baredfeetandteeth Says:

    High, I queue for you
    intent temper’d by false heart
    the poem’s line too long

  5. Jennifer L Says:

    What’s insanity?
    To be without one’s own books?
    Not gonna happen

  6. HitTheRhodes Says:

    Haiku’s are tough, man.
    Why can’t this be easier?
    Whatever, AJ.


  7. Damn you Aarron Sanchez, put your back into it.

    I did find this classic though/

    “Once I fought a bear
    Except he was a hobo
    I beat him forever”

  8. w0rmwood Says:

    My shoes cause me pain.
    Ok, that’s a dirty lie.
    I simply can’t dance.

  9. HitTheRhodes Says:

    I like this one too:

    Little chocolate dog.
    Why do you eat your own poop.
    That is disgusting.

  10. HitTheRhodes Says:

    AJ lists cartoons…
    Five part series? Try just three.
    Redulak is born.

  11. max Says:

    oh like i know how
    to write a haiku verse i
    am lost again damn

  12. Raul Pimento Says:

    No masturbation,
    there’s no time for any self love!
    Man! Work is no fun!

  13. .bb. Says:

    The girl sees Ramon.
    What’s that tingling sensation,
    between my two legs?

  14. thekenji Says:

    Papaya juice ingested
    My courage swelling
    To lose my virginity
    ————-
    Is that fruit juice? Asks the girl
    I proudly proclaim,
    Yes!! Now- who’s your papaya?
    ————-
    Rejection is cruel and swift
    High school sucked, but this…
    Is plain humiliating

  15. Baredfeethandteeth Says:

    Anyang Haseyo
    it fit right, dont knock it scum
    YOU try Korean

  16. baredfeetandteeth Says:

    oooh…i’m anonymous ^ sweet! I mean…nice one………………………….*shifty eyes* fuck.


  17. my cow dies daily
    blissfully, he moos in vain
    to quench my mad thirst

  18. max Says:

    is cow a metaphor for
    something not talked of?
    once again confused

  19. John Gap Says:

    It will burst from me
    but for now I hold it in.
    This passion is mine

  20. w0rmwood Says:

    Gap’s passion is his
    Oh god no, it burst from him
    I think she is now quite blind

  21. John Gap Says:

    My cup is empty
    Surely it soon will be full;
    these things happen often.

  22. John Gap Says:

    Crap, that’s 6 in the final line. Disqualified!

  23. w0rmwood Says:

    these things happen *too* often

  24. w0rmwood Says:

    humiliated
    damned this dislexia
    my last thought was wrong


  25. @max:

    It’s only a metaphor
    for my bovine lust.
    Fear my mad symbology!


  26. I punched a clown
    So many in tiny car
    Huge shoes assail me

  27. John Gap Says:

    My anaconda
    don’t want none unless it’s got…
    buns, Hun. Baby got back.

  28. baredfeetandteeth Says:

    I laughed at that rhyme
    what the fuck is wrong with me
    I need to get out


  29. Sour cream, straight up

    Raw, uncut… my freebase dream

    No nothin’, just curdle

  30. thekenji Says:

    Wasn’t this a contest?

    What happened to Arbitron?

    I demand closure


  31. Fair enough.
    The contest is now closed to new entry’s.
    I will now feed the information into the Arbirtion 6500 and await a winner selection.


  32. If freebasing sour cream for the sake of poetry doesn’t bring me greater status and monetary gain…

  33. baredfeetandteeth Says:

    Hi…witness the queen of the puns. I deserve the…erm…what are we after again?


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