BE; Bad people making sense: Dear India: smarten the fuck up
May 1, 2008
They drop babies off a fifty foot building…for luck…and good health.
What is the rational here: You do something so brutally unthinkable off the bat, that things are bound, statistical speaking, to improve for the child? Or perhaps the inevitable brain damage they suffer gives them a sunny disposition…that could be mistaken for life long happiness. Or, more likely, the process (and the concrete) simply weeds out unlucky children from their more fortunate brethren. Darwin’s retarded step sister at work.
I have seen crack addicted child mothers, on prom night, exercise more care and concern over their children..
Now I realize people are going to make the case for cultural variance, and religious tolerance: this is not a question of variance, but velocity. Lying about the Easter Bunny is an acceptable concession to superstition; whiplash is not an acceptable form of karmic adjustment. I don’t even like babies being dunked during baptism…flinging them naked off buildings, in the hopes that blanket wielding yokels will cushion their fall, is biblically irresponsible. Where are the mothers in this?
How does a tradition like this even start:
Tushar: Hey Rajwant, congratulations! How is the new baby.
Rajwant: A blessing, truly a blessing. Only…and I hesitate to say this aloud…he is a tad sickly, and his luck…the worst I’ve seen.
Tushar: Rough deal. Hey…this is a little unconventional, but do you know what you should try?
Rajwant: What is that?
Tushar: You need to take that kid to the tallest building in town…and just drop it off the side.
Rajwant: Are you serious? How is that a good idea?
Tushar: let me tell you this: my cousins wife accidentally dropped her son off a cliff, and now he sells more clay pots than anyone else in town. You’d be a fool not to do it!
Rajwant: I see you no holes in your logic. Get the ladder.
And this is the country we trust to provide tech support for complicated IT enterprises. I don’t want my LAN support team firing our server off a bridge, in the hopes of ensuring future network stability…it’s just bad business.
Oh sure: in a perfect world we could all fling whoever we want, off whatever we want, without consequence. We, however, live a world where there are substantial Newtonian repercussions to launching children off shrines…and any culture aspiring to a level above barbarism should take those repercussions into account, before incorporating gang baby tossing into their religious observances.
The only good thing about this video is the dude at the end busting out a powerslide drum solo. He saw the camera and took a shot at making the big time. While I generally wouldn’t advise a scene of communal child abuse as a ideal venue for self promotion, you have to respect his moxie.
Let me be the first to say I am not the best parent. I gave my children absurd names, am often drunk in their presence, and once forced them into a zeppelin race around the world to prove their love for me…and still, even I never considered hurling them off a five story tower for luck. All right…I did consider it…but I didn’t go through with it.
 Damn hippies, and closet babies flingers, for the most part
 Likely pressed beneath long poles, on a bonfire, to preserve their honor.